Wednesday, October 30, 2013

I Look A Lot Older Than I Am

When I was younger, probably around 17, people started telling me I looked a lot older than I was. Ever since then, it's become kind of a trend.
When I turned 19 and became of legal age to buy alcohol in Canada, it took me almost a year to ever get ID'd at a liquor store. I still rarely get ID'd for anything.

When I started working retail about 6 months ago, I began interacting with a ton of women everyday, mostly middle aged and elderly. Over the past few months I've been repeatedly hearing small references to my age- but it's no where near my actual age.

The average guess seems to be anywhere from 28-32.
I actually just turned 23.

I must admit that I do know why this happens. I think not only have I always looked older, but I dress older than I am (in comparison to other girls my age that I know), I talk about my kids and house, and I'm probably in the same mindset as someone 28-32 years of age.

The problem is that I guess it's been on my mind a lot lately. It doesn't exactly bother me, I just think about it a lot. If I lost weight would I look younger? Should I dress differently? When I'm 30 am I going to look 50?

I think it gets to me because my mom and grandma both look fairly young. Also, Chris looks exceptionally young for his age so sometimes I feel like he looks like my younger brother. He gets ID'd for everything and people constantly make references to the fact that he looks like he's 15. I worry that when we're 40, he'll look 20 and I'll look 60. Scary.

I can't lie, I've already started using anti-aging products (although I know they probably won't work). I know I probably shouldn't think about it as much as I do because it's rather unchangeable, but I can't help it. I guess I've discovered a new area to be self conscious about, which is just awesome. 

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